Overcoming Our Point Zero

This post is dedicated to my husband's donor, 

who gave him the best gift ever

the gift of a new beginning. 

The day we are born is our starting point in life, it's our point zero.  Maybe that's why people usually make such a fuss over their birthdays.  They plan and plan just to decide the best way to celebrate another year of life.  Some of us are such huge fans of our birthdays that we go to extreme measures of extravagance to please ourselves in each and every possible way.  Please, emphasize on the word, ourselves.  But,  do we really think about our lives and what we've made out of them?  I would really like to think that birthdays are more about reflecting on who we are, who we've become, and who we want to be, and less about shopping  for the perfect gift. It's the one day of the year that we need to get over ourselves and take a hard look at our lives. Easier said than done, but in the long run, any effort towards self-improvement is beneficial not only for ourselves, but also for those who surround us.

free clip art: http://amorelegnami.it/images/photos/index.php?p=16

After talking about the general concept of birthdays and all the nonsense that usually accompanies it, what I really wanted to share tonight in my blog, was the fact that my husband not only has one birthday, but two.

He doesn't really fuss about one of them, but makes a great deal about the other.   He was born on a February 28th, (the whole purpose of this one is just seeing plus one on his number line), but reborn again on a June 5th, 1995 when he had the blessing of receiving a new liver.

Every year when this day comes around, he celebrates his second new beginning, or better said,  his second point zero!  Not many people have the opportunity of a second chance not in, but at  life itself.  All the rest of us have just one shot at it.  We are born, live the best we can and one day pass away.  Some don't even make it through childhood, others make it up to a late onset in life, how short or long a life you get to live is and always will be a mystery.  Coming back to Carlos after being diagnosed with end stage liver disease apparently his number line would only reach 27, but miracles do happen and after a few bumps in the road, he was ready to receive his second chance that special day. This year, he reached number 47 on the number line we call life. 

With every sunrise we experience a new beginning.

He doesn't relinquish too much on himself, but in what he is and has been to others.  We have no words or actions to show how grateful we are to his donor's family for giving him the best present ever, his new life.  Not only does he celebrate his own, but also rejoices in the fact that his donor gave him the best present ever, the gift of life.  As I waited that night, I had the opportunity to talk to the husband of the woman who received his pancreas and kidneys and they sure were grateful as well.  Not to mention that I saw his heart and lungs ushered quickly to a waiting helicopter that would take them to Georgia, and last but not least his precious liver that was generously given to my beloved husband.  

When you face this kind of experience you really have no other option that to set  high standards for yourself. That can become a hard pill to swallow, yet he embraced it with fierceness.  Only striving to want to know that he has made a difference for others through his passage in life, that with each sunrise he continues to be worthy, and that when his parting day finally arrives,  he can gaze into the eyes of his children and be able to see that he HAS BEEN WORTHY.


Eighteen years have passed in a wink of an eye, and it seems like yesterday that I waited for precisely around eighteen hours to receive the great news that he had made it through surgery and was recovering in the ICU of Jackson Memorial Hospital in Florida.  Yet, I can say that I have had the blessing of witnessing how a young man became an outstanding human being who at least in my eyes has become worthy of the incredibly valuable gift  that a complete stranger bestowed on him so many years ago.     

 

In The Event Of Something Happening To Me...

April is organ donation awareness month, and  as a true believer in organ donation, I can't pass out on the opportunity of blogging about it. I'm not going into the facts about organ donation and how you can register to become a donor because that information is just a click away.   At Children's Hospital of Pittsburgh you can find great information on organ donation, and if you want to hear some incredible stories feel free to visit Transplant Friends.  Each story is compelling in it's own way.

This been said, let's get down to the nitty and gritty  of organ donation. First, nobody and when I say nobody, is prepared to face the difficult situation of having a transplant coordinator come up and ask you to donate your loved ones organs, even if he or she expressed in life that they wanted to become donors. 

I can only imagine the expressions of the family, as a complete stranger,  that seemed to be waiting on the side,  jumps in and asks the terrible question of,

-"Have you thought about donating "Jane or John Doe's" organs?  - (Remember we're making this up.)

Then continue to talk about the process, the marvelous thing you are doing for others, and the cliche "You are giving a gift of life." to another person (which is totally true).  In the meanwhile the person is in  total and complete shock,  they are speechless, the pain and grief of loosing that important person in their lives is overwhelming.  How does a person overcome this kind of tragedy and goes on to agree to donate?

I would think that some kind of conversations should have taken place with the donor prior to that moment in their lives. Maybe the donor at some point voiced his/her wishes and during those brief minutes, time is suspended and they hear his or her voice loud and clear.

 -"If anything happens to me, remember to donate my organs."

This is precisely why we need to talk about organ donation in the intimacy of our family circle.  These are conversations that are dreaded and seldom do we want to talk about death after dinner, but we need to get it out in the open.  Specially with the alarming statistics of people that die each day waiting for an organ donation.

Let's talk to our family, friends and anyone that needs to know how we feel about organ donation.  If you  want to become a donor voice it, and if you don't,  voice it as well.  Either way, it's fine!   Be sure that your family hears your voice loud and clear above all the grief and pain they are feeling than and there, and are able to follow your dreams of doing something worthy up to the last chapter of your life.